I've been sitting here in a chair at a table in my living room since March 10. That's now 33 days as of this writing. I've worked from here, written letters from here, eaten from here, socialized from here, and spent the last 33 days wondering - am I coming out of this alive?
I understand that the odds are in my favor especially when I have spent about 95% of those last 33 days indoors. When I have gone out, I'm wearing a mask and staying away from others - especially those that are clearly not taking this at all seriously. As a side note, I was mad at first at these types of people that are literally treating this as if it's any other time of their lives, and now I just go way out of my way to avoid them, calmly and cooly.
So here I sit.
I was thinking of this today, of all days, on Easter - how strange it is to be so beautiful out this spring and we can't be out in it as much as we'd like to be..... but I also look at it this way - how much worse would this be if was raining/snowing all the time?
Having the sunshine flow through my apartment and going out into it for the brief trip I take every day wouldn't be as valued - it would be something to 'get through'.
Yes. It's funny that it's this way, but I appreciate it. It makes it bearable.
... one last thought - seeing last year's plants still growing, and thriving in this weather has also given me a sense of hope, that life continues while go through this terrible time. I can't imagine how much worse it'd be if I looked out at my window and only saw dirt in the planters.
But there is mint that's growing crazy big. There's ivy that thrived throughout the mild winter. And yesterday, we walked to a plant store and along the way noticed, appreciated and photographed spring flowers erupting with new life. Then, we purchased and planted a little lavender 'tree' in the planter nearest to where I sit. Yes, spring is here and renewal is right around the corner.
I must hold on to that. We all must.