"You Are Home" Feed

Tuesday Morning - the Mom Blog

Good morning all - today, September 18th it's been 6 years since my mom, Joan, passed away after a long illness.

My plans today are generally to do what I do every day - job hunt and create comics ... but on this day I'll also listen to The Lawrence Welk Theme "Goodnight" song (a kind of "our song" thing) and, of course "Tie a Yellow Ribbon" song (which is the basis for The Joan Project). Mom also liked a lot of 1940s standards. My favorite, although I don't know if she liked it (although I suspect she did) is "I'll Be Seeing You".

Mom used to sing to herself while taking the curlers out of her hair in the bathroom - she standing there singing in her gorgeous voice while a cigarette smoldered in an ashtray teetering on the bathroom sink. The bathroom was tiny but had good acoustics and her quiet sound filled the room with joy. On occasion, I would sit in there with her and we'd talk about things. While strange, I suppose, those times are among those that I cherish, and the ones I miss most. 

Here's a pic from last year's remembrance of her - I went down to Riverside Park and enjoyed a little "mom and me" time. I was feeling particularly hopeless about a lot of things as I had, at that point, just finished some things in my life and was feeling a little bummed out about my life. To my surprise, Mom arranged for The Yellow to be presented to me in a way that was as big so that I couldn't possibly ignore it or write it off as 'coincidence'. No, I'm convinced that my mom chose to show me that she was looking out for me. And that mattered. 

Anyway, if your mom is still alive, consider honoring her with a phone call or note or even a visit. If she's not around any longer, I challenge you to make a list of all the ways in which she influenced your life. I will bet, in either case, you will be happy with the results. :) 

Have a great Tuesday! 


Happy Mother's Day 2018

In honor of my mom, Joan, gone nearly 6 years now, I'm posting a favorite set of photos of mine of her from Christmas 1994. I usually didn't have to persuade her too much to pose for a picture (she and I share that, I suppose) as long, of course, as she looked flawless, which she always did no matter what she was wearing, because that's just how she rolled. :) 

Happy Mother's Day to all moms today! 

Joan triptych

Jumping for Joy - "You Are Home" - The Joan Project

KristenMomYellowParisFB400It started with a blog post I wrote about my mother Joan's passing on September 19th, 2012.

I wrote that she used to 'tie a yellow ribbon' around a tree in my childhood home's front yard to indicate that I was always welcome in her home despite my siblings increasing hostility/indifference towards me after I came out in 1989.

My friend Kristen took a pictures of "the yellow" (a bandana) and I shared it during the celebration I had for her here in New York in the days following her passing.

When Kris went to Italy and to France and was going to take the bandanas with her, she asked me what I wanted to have written on them. I came up with "You Are Home".

As this same childhood home had been offered to Medicaid to pay for Joan's medical bills and so is now gone, I want her to know that she now always has a home whereever I am. Her home is now with me.

LondonyellowblogAnd since my friends are my family, whereever they are, she is there with them too. And I love the idea that they can take and leave a little bit of her yellow in various places around the world. :)

Since this started, I've seen "the yellow" all over the place - like a flower that dropped out of a children's bouquet at a wedding and landed at my feet;  yellow ribbons tied to a tree in Riverside Park and even a string quartet playing the Beatles' "Yellow" at one event that I was at.

It's nice to feel as though Joan is watching over me..... or at least is enjoying whatever party I'm at. :)

Enjoy the Joan Project as it forms over time. :)